I think

 I think, 

that if,

 I loved

this boy

 any more

....

....that my heart would swell and burst into a million billion pieces!

AHHHHHHH! 

I love you kiddo.

aka; the Blur ;)

Pumpkin patch 2014

I am a sucker for pumpkin patch photos. I really am. I have been ever since Louisa was a little baby. I don't know what it is but I just have to get myself some photos of my kids playing/sitting/exploring amidst those bright orange pumpkins! And I l.o.v.e looking at other people's pumpkin patch photos, too. Every year. It never gets old. Never never.

But, I have to tell you, I feel as though posting these pictures is a complete sham becaaaaaaaause....this year we were at the this farm for 15 minutes. Literally. That's it.

We just couldn't stay because #1 it was INSANELY crowded. It was ridiculous. I felt like we were a bunch of city-folk driving out to a farm for the obligatory fall-activity. I mean, ok, that IS what we were doing...but why did there have to be thousands of other people doing at the same time as us?! It took probably 20 minutes to find a parking spot. 20 MINUTES. There was a huge line to get into the lot backing up this country road, and then we had to wait for someone to pull out. Then, every activity had a huge long line. You couldn't walk anywhere without bumping into someone. Grrr. frustrating. And #2 it was legitimately hot outside! Not my favorite thing to be walking around in a crowd when it's hot trying to keep track of four kids.

Well, I learned my lesson. Which was a lesson I already knew about, actually, so I'm mad at myself.
1. DON'T go somewhere on a weekend.
2. DON'T leave your house immediately after the football game is over.
3. DON'T go on a sunny day. No matter what. Stay home on sunny days. Play in your own back yard. Especially if it is a weekend.

I really should have known better. Some of our friends who we were going to meet out there had tougher skin and stayed anyway. And other friends were smart and went first thing in the morning when they opened. DURING the football game. Smart kids.

 "duh mommy"

"such a silly mommy!"

Oh well. All is not lost. I snapped furiously and got some funny, some cute pics. There's always the much closer, much smaller pumpkin patch/farm to go to if there's time. And we'll be going on a weekday ;)

Please tell me you can detect my forced/annoyed smile? Because I so can. I was thinking, "I want out of here. And Michael, stop stepping on my boot!" Meanwhile Lou was pouting off to the side because she caught wind that we weren't staying.

 

 

LOL; Emmett!

That's better. But wait, what are you lookin' at Michael? The hundreds of cars trying to cram into the parking lot??

"Well I'm outta here!" - Michael
"I just realized I'm not wearing any pants!" - Emmett

Come on. Those were totally worth the drive, right?? :) SEE. I still love it. The orange, dirty pumpkins and the kids who enjoy posing for pictures more than anything!

Ok Ok. A few more. If you insist.

 My big girl! I need to hunt down my photos from her very first pumpkin patch visit!

 They did enjoy looking at the crowd-free farm equimpment. Until Michael realized he couldn't climb up on anything. That made him very mad.

 

4.75 for 4.95 gallons? If only!

And if we don't make it to another patch this year, at least we will have these pics of Emmett...who is always happy...no matter how big the crowds are ;)

Happy Fall!

pretty*happy*funny*real

pretty

pretty lovely fall day, happenin' now, people!

happy

Look who's big enough to hang out on mom's back!

funny

sweet, right?

So sweet! 

I was pushing them around for a while in here and Michael LOVED it. Emmett was happy for a while but then....

wait for it....

then he was done!

but I promise he did like it for a good while! He loves his big brother.

real

Just having a pretty good, sunny day (and week!)

Some little things like my Lou bear being a little sick, staying up until midnight too often, trying to get to the post office but being foiled at every turn, and making a delicious pumpkin cheescake last night and accidentally eating half of it already....those are some "reals" to report. But nothing terribly messy or frustrating to write down! I suppose I'm in an especially good mood because I'm hanging out with one of my best friends and Emmett's godmother tonight (yaaaay!)

So, go check out Like Mother Like Daughter for more daily contentment posts, and Auntie Leila's lovely hydrangea's post (I look forward to that post every year!) Aren't they gorgeous?!? 

Moving along

 

Well, the month of October seems to be moving right along. The signs of fall are everywhere, though the temperatures haven't dropped too much yet. I think I heard the weather report for this weekend was going to be around 70...

Still. I have been enjoying the change of scenery. Also, as the month moves along I've noticed the little changes in the kids as well as some growth spurts. I feel like Emmett went through a huge one, and still is! There's nothing that makes you feel the passage of time so acutely than watching the infant stage come and go.

 

 

We are going along fine with homeschooling as well. We have our interruptions and everything, but for the most part we've been able to get in a solid hour-hour and a half, four days a week.  Maybe that doesn't sound like much, but it actually is plenty for Kindergarten and Preschool. The rest of the day is spent playing, helping, and learning here at home and out and about. Already Louisa's reading is getting stronger as she is practicing more consistently than she was over the summer. I'm so excited to see her become a strong, independent reader! I'm also loving homeschooling in that we are able to maintain that freedom to set our own schedule, go on "field trips", and just enjoy the pace we set around here as a family.

 

The only stumbling blocks I've faced so far is that I myself wish I had more time to get ready in the morning, as I don't like doing school in my pj's. But that is really challenging because Emmett has been waking up super early lately (like 6) so I haven't found time to spend much time on myself getting ready before I'd like to get school going (around 9) So sometimes that's hard. Sometimes I do imagine how it would be nice to send off the two oldest, then have just me and the boys around. I could get a lot more done. I'm pretty sure that's a common feeling among homeschooling mama's, though.

 

(Week 6)





 

Between homeschooling, co-op, music classes, friend's coming over, seeing grandparents, playing outside, baking cookies....

 

sugar!!!

 

....I think the kids are having a good time in general :)



 

And what about me? I feel like I am hanging in there. Usually I have a few mornings a week where I wake up feeling overwhelmed right off the bat. My mind starts racing, thinking of all I want to accomplish that day, and how unlikely it is that I will get to everything. Or I'm thinking about how tired I am and how I'm going to make it through my first, second, and third shifts as mom. In a lot of ways I really have to live hour to hour, not day to day. When I manage to do that, I am able to focus better and feel more content and less panicky.

 

It's definitely a challenging time for me as a mother, but it's also an incredibly fruitful time as well. A time where I'm learning so much about my own willingness to sacrifice, which is just another word for love. This month of October is definitely the fullest, messiest, rawest, blessed October I've ever experienced in my life. Sometimes I really have to force myself and sit down and catch my breath.

 

There's little time to sit and reflect, but when I do, I recognize that God is my Sheppard through these dog years of parenting. He is guiding me along the path of holiness and love.

 

 

And I know, for certain, that this is the only path I want to ever be on.

 

May the rest of October be blessed, fun, and fruitful. For my family and yours!

Keep Calm and Write a Blog

You know I'm stressed when I go almost a week and a half without posting. I'm just not that kind of blogger. Yeah, sure, admittedly I've gotten more spread out with my posts this year, but mostly I still post at least once a week, right? I've said it many times before, but blogging is really important to me. It actually helps me de-stress. If I am having a hard time, it helps to write. It helps process the difficulty and makes me feel better knowing it's out of my head and written down. Even though I don't do a ton of heavy posts -I mostly talk about our daily goings-on- I still sometimes write more intensely and don't hit publish (secrets secrets, I know!)

So when I looked at my blog the other day and saw that it was last Friday that I last wrote anything, I thought to myself, "whoa, Kayleen. You are really stretched thin here. No time to blog? You NEED time to blog. You best make some time!"

I mean, for a lot of people it seems pretty silly to be so concerned about it. If it's just one more thing to do, then it would seem that the logical thing to do would be to set it aside. Why worry about it? Shouldn't you use your limited free time wisely?

I guess when I look at my blog, I feel like I have this continual documentation of my motherhood. I started it in those early days of morning sickness with my oldest child, and here I am nurturing my fourth baby! Pretty cool. I'd be lying if I didn't say I am proud of myself. Again though, my main motivation in keeping up this blog is that it helps me. In so many ways, friends.

So yes, these days when I take a look at it and realize it's been a while, I recognize it as a sign that I'm too busy, too stressed, too something. Even with four children, a momma needs time to herself and needs to do things that motivate her and nourish her tired self. Right? Don't they say that...?

Well, I think so. So while the kids watch t.v. and Emmett plays in the swing beside me, here goes; just a little update.

*Deep breath* Oh, is that a tear drop? It's okay. Pictures. Documentation of this hard, wonderful life.

Same day at the park.

Unfortunately, I haven't been taking many pictures lately with my big camera. I wish I had a smaller one since it's not the easiest thing to add an extra heavy bag with my entourage. Most times if I go somewhere I've got Emmett in the carrier, Michael in the stroller, and the girls walking beside me. Nowhere really to put that big thing. So all I've got is phone pictures. Not that they are so bad, I guess.

So a few weeks ago I had made an appointment to have all of us get flu shots. I just have this ominous feeling that this season is going to be especially bad with sicknesses all around. I want to do what I can. A big part of me is grateful my kids aren't in school because that will lessen some of their exposure. Yet we still have co-op and gymnastics class and of course we'll be in public places so there's still a big chance of coming home with lovely germs. So anyway, I also had an appointment on the books for Emmett's four month check up. Ultimately, I got the two appointments mixed up. It was really annoying because guess what? I decided to drop Emmett off at my in-laws that day so I could have more arms to comfort the big kids! So I arrived for Emmett's appointment without Emmett. Where are my brain cells? It was fine, I have a great relationship with their pediatrician (since she is also my OB! :) and it wasn't a big deal. But still, I felt bad because she is really busy and works off a tight schedule.

So after we got back from out appointment I grabbed Emmett and we went for a little walk over to the park since daddy was going to be home late anyway. It was pretty fun. I posted some pictures on Instagram. I rested while the kids played. Then we walked back to the van only to realize that I didn't have my keys in my purse! I remembered Michael playing with them but thought I had put them back in my purse. So I had to run back over there and luckily they were right there in the grass where we had been. Phew.

So skip ahead to the weekend and it was time for Salmon Days. I have recorded many-a Salmon Day weekends on this blog. We first went when Lou was a baby (though of course Mike had been going throughout his childhood) Here and here and here are some more Salmon Days posts.

I didn't take many photos this year. Again with the limited hands and many distractions thing. We saw the parade in the morning then we made different decision this year to not take all the kids with us when we walked around to see the booths. It's just not that fun for them or for us because it's pretty crowded and we don't normally even buy anything, we just like to look. For kids that's hard. Also, the main attraction, which is supposed to be the salmon returning here to spawn, is something we see a lot before and after the festival since we live so close. So it was so nice of my mother in law to just take the kids back up to the house to hang out while Mike, Emmett and I got to walk around and enjoy the sights and sounds. Then we brought the kids back freebies like water bottles and bags and such. 

Something different about this year was that Mike ran in the annual 5k race they have on Sunday! I had suggested it back in August. Mike wanted to start running at night for exercise and I thought having something to train for would be helpful for motivation. 

waiting for the start to the race

I'm sorry, but I thought he looked so cute! I snuck a lot of pictures of him.

He did really well! I better not publish the time, but I thought it was great. And it was interesting to see the stats you could look up online to see where he placed in his gender and age range. He really did a good job. Especially for a man with four kids who doesn't exactly have a ton of time to train. I'm really proud of him and he said it was fun.

We all (the kids and I, Mike's mom and my mom) watched from the sidelines and cheered him on, even though we only got to actually see him for a couple of seconds. :)

It's a very popular 5k. I think there were about 1200 people running it.

I ended up with a nasty migraine though! I am starting to wonder if part of my problem is psychological at this point. I mean, obviously there is something physiological going on and that is very real. But this weekend I kept thinking of how I got one of my worst migraines EVER exactly one year ago at Salmon Days! I mean, there is also a lot of walking and people and some stress from getting everyone ready and out the door, etc. But like I said, I kept thinking and thinking about it. See, it was actually kind of traumatic last year because I had just taken a pregnancy test and knew I was pregnant with Emmett, so I could not take my migraine medication. I had to wait it out and it was truly terrible. Anyway, isn't it curious that I ended up with a migraine Saturday night? And to top it off, the meds took forever to work and I was really nauseated. It's not a good sign. For many migraine sufferer's the medication begins to wear off after extended use; your body gets used to it. I'm also experiencing rebound headaches which are also common. So anyway, it's a problem. But I am starting to come to the realization that stress is a major trigger. And how can you completely eliminate a trigger like that? You can't. But I need to figure some things out in my life to mitigate that stress or else I will continue suffering physically from headaches. 

Still, Salmon Days is always a weekend we look forward to. It will always hold a special place in this family's hearts. 

Monday was the girls' co-op. They are only taking one class right now. It's called 'Fun with Nature". It's pretty cute. They just do little things like gathering plants and playing games and stuff. Last week they made tea using ingredients they found. Yes, Louisa assured me that their teacher told them they can't just consume any plant they find because some plants are poisonous and could make them sick. So Louisa is very aware of that fact! Both girls are in it, but for some reason this time Josie was being very clingy and didn't want to go. It was okay with me. We are actually planning on switching co-ops after this session. I didn't realize there was one closer to my house and with more families we actually know it it! Josie just waited in the car with me and the boys and acted really silly.

Finally, yesterday evening the Seahawks played again after their bye week. They won - woo-hoo! Football is so fun to watch. Especially when your team is really really good. 

There is so much energy around here regarding the team. It's pretty contagious. Maybe you don't feel like sports are important, and that's okay. But I think for us it's just fun and something to look forward to. We've already spent lots of get together with friends and family watching the Seahawks and now we have 13 more weeks to look forward to. So yeah, go Hawks!

***

Well, that's all I have for now. Emmett fell asleep in his swing and the kids are starting to get restless downstairs. Time to start bedtime. Daddy is gone at a meeting so it's all me. yay.

I'll catch up more later. Hopefully the next post won't be so long, just another little update. Which is just how I like it. 

***UPDATE: Daddy arrived home shortly after posting this and did bedtime. Whew.